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NEEDS - BOUNDARIES - SKILLS - RESILIENCE - EVOLVE


In a project that is based in Collaborative Intelligence (CQ) it is Collaboration, rather than Intelligence, that presents challenges.  Our community and culture have a tendency toward polarisation, separation, competition and a 'law of the jungle' mentality.  It doesn't have to be this way but as we probe and explore the roots of our overly ego based society the causes emerge and, if one comes to view collaboration as a solution, the ways that we become programmed by the way things have been can be seen to be dysfunctional and the solutions clear and relatively easily achievable.

We have been researching and developing models and approaches to understand and pioneer and collaborate with ways to recover from that which has been such a default program for so long.

The key areas that we are currently weaving together into both visual models and skill development pathways are as follows.

  • Understanding and balancing individual needs with Group/Community needs
  • Trust (Fear)
  • Trauma/Stress/Safety/Grounding
  • Non-Judgmental communication skills
  • Attachment styles and ability to connect.(both in one's own body/self and with others)
  • Self Authority

There is much to go into in all of these elements, and a thorough version is being developed for presentation very soon, but right here this is just an overview to give a general insight into each element and also how they fit together.

Understanding and balancing individual needs with Group/Community needs.

We started with an understanding of Maslow's Hierarchy of needs. How can any individual, even before they participate in a relationship/group, function optimally, confidently and effectively when they are having to deal with both basic and also complex needs?
Firstly, understanding one's own essential needs, then the needs of a group and then how to balance both so that there is an understanding and also a realistic relationship between the two we see as essential to the building of any sustainable relationship (both with self and outside of self).
Furthermore, when the balance is understood and is healthy, the cycle of resourcing can sustain both.


Trust (Fear) - [see also: Attachment styles and ability to connect]

The balance of Trust/Fear within our present will undoubtedly have roots within our past and when it comes to collaboration, specifically in our past experiences of relating to others.
From Parents to siblings, other children, teachers, lovers, employers and society as a whole. Within these experiences our ratio of fear will also define our ratio of self protection and correspondingly our ability to connect and trust both ourselves and others.

 

Trauma/Stress/Safety/Grounding

We have discovered over the last 10 years of specific study into this subject, that trauma and stress are a key element in how people relate to each other.  The essential component in understanding this is the fight/flight/freeze combination that reside to varying degrees within the body and can be triggered by any number of responses from both situations and other people.
Feeling safe is a perquisite to feeling grounded and when we are grounded we are not reacting from tension or stress but are able to respond from a place of calm confidence.
The implications of this within a collaborative environment cannot be underestimated but is routinely done so.
Tension, Stress and Trauma are all located in the body so when people trigger each other and then attempt to resolve the situation using words and concepts have little real chance of success because they are not even beginning to address the real source of the difficulty.
There are a number of techniques to release tension, stress and trauma from TRE, Somatic Experiencing, EMDR, Brainspotting to massage, physical activity or simply touch!

 

Non-Judgmental communication skills

Marshall Rosenberg, the developer of Non Violent Communication [NVC] said "Our attention is focused on classifying, analysing, and determining levels of wrongness rather than on what we and others need and are not getting."
When it comes to learning how to communicate and interact with others the kind of teaching we get is extremely varied and except in families that are non judgemental, most people are more likely to experience judgement as a common feature of interaction.
Consequently, we generally don't understand just how this default way of communicating is playing out continually and most specifically within relational environments that feature any level of collaboration.
We see learning NVC as an essential foundation block of any serious sustainable organisation/community/relationship.

 

Attachment styles and connect-ability

How we learn to interact with others.  The normal or default expectations we have of any relational situation and when it comes to collaboration, understanding the degree with which we can connect and the degree with which we need to protect.  This is a vital understanding both in terms of self understanding and also what the boundaries are with others and how and where precisely they can be extended.

 

Self Authority

Where do we get our authority from and can we work out reliably what is true, what is our motive for doing things and can we estimate the same in others. 

 

prerequisite


GINI
T +44 778 795 7021

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